This class isn’t for beginners

I’ve just come from my first time at the Friday afternoon stretch class at the gym.  Man, I had no freaking idea my legs could open that wide.  I feel like I’ve spent the whole day standing with my one foot in Australia and the other foot in Norway.  I am so gonna walk like a cowboy tomorrow..

Why is it that gym instructors never seem glad when new people join the class?  Today the instuctor walked right into my personal space, so that her face was about 15cm from mine, just close enough that I got really worried that she would smell the martini I had over lunch, and told me that it isn’t really a beginners class and that I should pace myself.  Maybe she did that because she could in fact smell the martini and just had to get a good look at the weird chick who comes to gym drunk.  (It was only one martini, I swear it!)

Just once though, I would like to join a new class and have the instructor smile and welcome me before telling me the class isn’t for beginners.  And seriously, if the class isn’t for beginners, how did all the other people join it?  Wasn’t everybody a beginner at some stage?  Or did the class spring fully formed from the loins of some gym-god, everybody with years of special stretching training under the belt?

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